


Personal Thoughts of Ms. 	Angela Martinelli, Actress Extraordinaire

by HumsHappily



Series: Someone to Remember [2]
Category: Agent Carter (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: BAMF Angie, BAMF Peggy Carter, Carternelli, Cartinelli - Freeform, Diary/Journal, F/F, Heavy Petting, Kissing, POV First Person, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2017-07-02
Packaged: 2018-03-17 00:55:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 5,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3509132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HumsHappily/pseuds/HumsHappily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><strong>ex·tra·or·di·naire</strong><br/>ikstrôrdiˈner/<br/>adjective; informal<br/><i> outstanding or remarkable in a particular capacity. <i></i></i></p><p>  <i></i><br/><i> The following are the personal diary entries of Miss Angela Martinelli in her own words. They have been recorded here and saved for posterity. Miss Martinelli and her partner Margaret Carter served at the behest of both British and American governments for many years, and received multiple commendations for their actions in the field. <i></i></i><br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. March 8th

**March 8th, 6:20 a.m.**

I can't sleep again. It's a good thing that I ain't got the morning shift at the automat. It'd be hell trying to deal with customers on no sleep. An' my head is pounding.

 

It feels kinda funny to be writing like I talk. But, doesn't make sense to do it any other way. I'm sure when I'm old an' grey, I'll be reading it back this way. Better remember how I spoke back in these days right? I'll be rich and famous and on Broadway soon, so I'll enjoy using my Brooklyn accent while I can.

 

Speakin' of work, we got a new face yesterday. Didn't catch her name, but she's English. I'm gonna call her that until I figure it out. Probably somethin fancy, like Elizabeth, or Margaret. Maybe Katharine or Alexandra. Ain’t too many fancy names I can think of off the top of my head.  Besides, English is a better nickname than Duchess. Which is what I could call her, I mean, she holds her head real high. Acts like royalty. Wouldn't that be swell? Me talking to some English royalty. She said she'd come back soon, that I served the best coffee she's had in a long time. Anyway, so she comes in, dressed in a pant suit no less, sits down, gets some rhubarb pie. I come over with the coffee an' she's just sitting there, sucking on the spoon with a look of bliss on her face. She's beautiful, red stained lips wrapped all around that silver spoon, smudge of mascara under the bottom of her right eyelashes. I nearly dropped the coffee pot right there.

 

And then she opened her eyes. Dark brown, like Valentine's chocolates. Matched real nice with the color of her hair, let the red of her lips pop. Pop used ta carve little wooden treasure boxes. They’d shine in the light, all dark, thick wood. That’s what English’s hair reminded me of. Mahogany. Mahogany waves.

 

And then she opened her mouth and started talkin' to me. And her voice musta been made of the same chocolate as her eyes, because it was smooth and sweet and nearly tore me to pieces. Anyway, she starts by talking about coffee, and it's about three good minutes before I even manage to pour her a mug ‘cause I can’t focus with the way she’s going on. That accent made the world spin around me, I was near ta terrified that I’d go and spill something down my front.

 

Anyway, after a while she finished up her pie, set her spoon down an’ left. I had ta resist the urge to wipe the smudge of lipstick at the corner of her mouth. Woulda been real strange for me to be doing that. She did say she’d come back in sometime.

 

I hope she does.

  
  
  



	2. March 9th

**March 9th, 12:11 a.m.**

 

I had to close up tonight. Margie got sick halfway through her shift, begged me to cover for her. I said yeah, but only cause she’s gonna embroider my apron for me. I want lil bees done all along the bottom. Peaches too. I love peaches. I can remember going down to visit Great Aunt Cath in Georgia. Right at the end of May, when  the peaches had just come into season. I’d go out to the orchard, climb up a tree and pluck em down. I’d eat till the juice was dripping down my chin, spotting all over my overalls. Eventually, when my belly was so full it popped out like a little santa stomach, I’d grab a few more, shove them in my pockets and go out and explore. There was a little stream that ran behind the back of the property, an’ the last of the tadpoles would be squirming around as the water dried up. I used ta love going around, exploring.

 

One year, there was a drought. The trees in the orchard got all wrinkled, dried up and sad. Didn’t get many peaches that year. The ground was so dusty that each step I took, little puffs of rusty red dirt would shoot up from around my shoes. I had white little booties and a sea green colored dress that year. Momma said I was getting too old for overalls, had to wear dresses now. When I came back, covered in mud, with two skinned knees and grin that stretched from ear to ear, she changed her mind real fast. Didn’t know what happened to that dress for a good bit. I do remember that Aunt Cath had a swell green and red table runner for a few years after. I can figure it out from there.

 

I wonder if English likes peaches. She’s had a slice of rhubarb pie and apple pie so far. I wonder if I can get her to try the peach pie. I gave Chef Martin the recipe Aunt Cath taught me. Since he tried it out, we got people eating it faster than we can bake the stuff. Sure does make a mean pie. Maybe next time I’m on break I’ll have a slice. With some vanilla ice cream if I can beg it offa Martin. Try not to eat it too often. Gotta keep my figure for the stage.

  
  
  



	3. March 16th

**March 16th, 5:34 p.m.**

Who doesn’t like peaches! Here I am, working away and English comes in. Sits right down with a slice of fresh peach pie. I go to bring her some coffee, turn around and she’s gone! Left the piece of pie sitting there, with a single bite taken out of it. After that the whole day just went to the dogs. The one fella, calls himself Joe, decided to pinch my cheek. And not the one on my face. I ‘accidentally’ spilled the whole jug of coffee over his shoes.

He left, madder than the folks in Washington when FDR decided to run for a third term. I got yelled at by the boss then, but I saw Martin giving me a victory sign from the kitchen. Martin is a real nice fella, but his gal ain’t as nice. She’s got a real problem with Martin working at the automat, figured he’d be rich and famous in some five star restaurant by now. Martin’s been saying he’s gonna pop the question, but I think it ain’t a good plan. You can’t marry someone who isn’t with you on everything. Gotta have support, ya know?

Martin deserves someone sweet. He's real nice, loves kids. This one time, I saw him outside near the dumpster. Couldn't figure you what he was doing. Kept seeing him there over and over again. I eventually went ta find out. Martin was playing with these little kittens. The mama cat and him were friends, and she didn't seem to mind, since she was laying there purring up a storm.  Martin jumped when he saw me coming, like I was gonna make fun of him or something.

First, who is gonna make fun of a man for loving animals and treating em nicely?

And second, why is Martin jumping so much?

I promised myself I'd keep an eye on him. You hafta watch out for your friends.


	4. March 20th

** March 20th, 5 am **

 

I ain't made for early morning shifts. I swear there ain't nothing I hate more than dragging myself outta bed to make it to the automat on time. We open at six, but lordy, I wish we didn't. I'm bringing three scripts with me today to read over, might as well do something productive. Wonder if English will be in today. One of the auditions I'm doing is for some kinda high brow English dame. Maybe I should ask her if she'll help me out.

  
Better take off now if I wanna be there on time. If I'm quiet, Mrs. Fry won't even get to huff at me about keeping respectable hours. I'll get off around lunchtime, catch a meal and then some shut eye. Then off to a call back, for that part in The Dancing Piper. I can't even play the pipes. I can play a mean fiddle though, real good with my hands on the strings. Uh oh, looks like I missed the bus. Ain't life grand? Better run!

 


	5. March 22nd

** March 22nd, 2 am  **

There ain't no way I'm gonna ever have a normal sleeping schedule. May as well give up. I'm gonna say it right now, this is gonna be a real long entry. I saw English out dancing. Lord, I nearly fell down. Well, to be fair, she wasn’t dancing, not when I saw her. And it was a sure shame that I didn’t.

She was all done up, in these real sweet kitten heels, lipstick perfect and bright red like always. Makes me wanna see how her lips taste. I know it ain't exactly proper to be having these thoughts, but I figure I'm old enough now. If God don't want me having em, he coulda sent a sign. Or better yet, he wouldn't have made me the way I am.

See, I might have been raised proper, all high brow morals and stuff, but it ain't done much to change me. My momma did well by me, taught me right from wrong. And I know I'm right. This is just the way I am, and I'm gonna figure that by the time someone reads this besides me, people are gonna understand that. I just can't believe that cause I like dames as much as another girl likes her fellas, that I'd get punished ya know?

 

Anyway, so what happened was that Margie asked me if I wanted to go dancing. I told her sure, cause I haven't had an occasion to go dancing in ages and I was tired of hangin' around the Griffiths all the time. Day in, day out, it's all the same there. Nothing changes. I was gonna lose my mind if I had ta stare at the wallpaper any longer.

So I got all dolled up, snuck out past Mrs. Fry and met Margie outside. Got on the bus to the dance hall and ran on inside, cause it was awful cold and windy. So we’re in the dance hall, and the next thing I know, Margie’s run off with some fella to the back hall, and I’m sure not gonna go after her. So I’m sitting at the table alone, nursing a drink. There's this fella eyeing me up, and I'm ignoring him. All of a sudden I see this flash of silver outta the corner of my eye. I look up right? And English is there. She's talking to some dame up at the bar, then some man comes, grabs the gals elbow and yanks. My jaw nearly hit the floor, cause the gal stumbles an’ nearly falls. English whirls on him, punches him right in the nose and drags the girl away. He tries to come after them, and all of a sudden, he’s down on the floor, and English has got her heel pressed into his neck. The fella is looking terrified now, and English just smiles and crouches down to whisper in his ear. I swear, I saw the blood run from his face.  She let him up an’ he booked it outta there so fast.

English acted real sweet then, making sure the girl was okay. Dried her tears, got her a stiff whisky. I had to do it. I slinked up to the bar, trying not to be seen and listened in. The girl was saying something about how that fella had been a real peach to begin with, but quickly turned sour. She just kept thanking English over and over again.  And that was when I heard it. English’s real name? Peggy. Her name is Peggy.

Ain’t it perfect? I bet it’s a nickname or somethin, but Peggy suits her. Kinda soft and sweet, but it bites if ya say it right.  Anyhow, Margie came back then, lipstick mussed and a real pleased smile on her face. Looked like the cat that had caught the canary. Which, I suppose she did. I didn’t notice English leave, but she must have, cause I didn’t see her for the rest of the night. Margie and I left a little around one, and I managed to sneak past Mrs. Fry. I might have ta go back to that dance hall. Seems like a real good place to be.

 

Peggy. I’m gonna be dreamin’ about that name, just you watch.

  
  



	6. April 1st

 

**April 1st, 9 pm**

I’m grumpy. Can ya blame me? I’ve been working forty plus hours a week, only made about four dollars in tips the whole time. I haven’t seen Peggy, err English, since the dance hall. I gotta make sure I don’t start calling her Peggy when she comes into the automat. Wouldn’t wanna scare her away. She might get real cautious if I start using her name, seeing as we ain’t ever actually been introduced. I wanna know where she’s gotten ta though. Normally she’s in at least three times a week, if only for coffee or a sweet slice of pie. I don’t think I’ll ever get over the way she eats. Like she can’t hardly believe somethin’ can taste that good. All blissed out, like there’s angels singing in her head. I’d love to see if she gets that look on her face when she tastes...well… I can’t be think about such things. Not right before bed anyway. Gets awful lonely when you hear the city going on outside your window, but the bed next to ya is cold. That’s another reason why I’m grumpy. Feels like I’m always on my own. I mean, Margie and Martin and the other girls at the Griffiths are nice, but, I just kinda want someone to talk to. I want someone to curl up beside, run their fingers through my hair as I tell em’ about my day. I don’t think that’s too much to ask. Well, maybe one day I’ll get lucky. Until then, it’s just me


	7. April 7th

**April 7th, 2 pm**

 

Quick entry because I’m on my way out, but I gotta role! For that real strange production, right offa main behind the market. I guess it’s gonna be a street performance, raise awareness for veterans. I’m gonna be a grieving widow I guess, whose husband died  in the first war and whose son is going off to the second. He comes back sometime in act three, got his leg blown off. He’s real bad in the head, struggling a lot.

I see that a lot actually. Near closing some nights, Jim shows up, maybe three times a week. Real sweet fella, from somewhere near Detroit. Used to work on the assembly line, until he got drafted into the first war. He comes in, goes all the way to the back corner, faces the door. Drinks his coffee black, has a sandwich and leaves. After a few weeks of him coming in, I was able to weasel his name out of him, just sat down one day and chattered away on my break. Made sure I didn’t block his view of the exits, didn’t make any sudden movements.

He didn’t say much, but he smiled, and I figured that was a win. I handed him a slice of cake before he left, wrapped up so he could carry it home. He patted my hand on the way out, left a nice tip on the table.

Now everytime he comes in, I make sure I’ve got something sweet waiting behind the counter for him. It can be hard on your own, especially when you got a lot of noise in your head, voices of people you can’t see any more. It’s real tough to be a soldier. But I think it might be tougher to come home.


	8. April 8th

**April 8th, 6 pm**

Honest, I swear I’m not dancing around my room. Today has been such a good day, I’m bout to cry tears’a  joy! I had my first rehearsal, and the director said I had real talent. He’s considering swapping me for another role, because I don’t look old enough to be a widow. Which is just swell, cause I’ll get the lead then. I’ll be the romantic interest for the returning soldier, a nurse that I guess runs into him in the street. I’ll have to describe a bit more later, maybe copy some of the script in.

 

But, here is what actually made this day golden. I swear I saw God today, and I sure wasn’t in church when it happened. I was walking back from rehearsal, already floating on cloud nine, and I bumped into Miss Margaret Carter. That’s right. Peggy is short for Margaret. She _remembered_ me. Me! Smiled at me and everything, apologized for not being in to see me at the automat. Promised to come in sometime soon! Lord, I love that smile.

I honestly can’t even explain how happy I am. Hell, I might go to church. I might call my gran, ask her if she's been lighting candles for me.

Things are sure looking up, an' up is just swell!


	9. April 9th

**April 9th, 5am**

Things are not looking up. I'm sick, been up all night getting sick inta the toilet. Mrs. Fry just kinda came in and clicked at me with that disapproving look. She did come back up ta my room with some tea though, afterwards. Offered to call a doctor to see me.

I told her I was fine, thanked her for the tea. Got Joan, the new girl to fill my shift at the diner. She's real sweet, but gotta mouth on her like nobody's business. Irish too.

I'm gonna try an’ sleep some more. Thank goodness I don't have rehearsal! 


	10. April 9th, Second Entry

**April 9th, 6pm**

Musta been food posionin’. I’m all but better now, just kinda gassy. That ain’t any stranger than normal though, Momma always said I was full of it! She did mean talkin’ of course. Never did know when ta shut my mouth. Lemme tell you bout all the arguments I got into. I still got a scar on my leg from when my cousin Alfonso Martinelli-Abelli, who everybody called Alfie, decided to bite me. All because I told him he couldn’t steal the oranges from Mrs. Johnson down the road. Now, Mrs. Johnson was a real nice old lady. Unless,  of course, you stole from her fruit trees.  Then she would get real angry. Alfie was just stupid, always going over. When he'd get caught, he'd pretend he was me, cause Mrs. Johnson never wore her glasses. She was blind as a bat. So if Allie got caught, I'd be the one getting popped!

One day, I'd had enough. I dragged him out into the street and tied him to a lampost with my laces. Man, he kicked and screamed like nobody’s business. I was laughing a little, I mean can ya blame me? Here’s this kid, who acts all tough on the streets and some girl drags him out and ties him up. He wasn’t impressed. I figured he deserved it, since he was always going on about how “girls can’t do nufin, so they shouldn’t try.” I really don’t like Alfie, even now he’s a big ol’, well never mind that. So I was laughing then, all of a sudden he breaks free and comes after me. Well, I ain’t stupid, so I break out an’ run. Except, he catches me! Knocks me down to the ground. I decided to fight dirty, cause he was laughing and talking down to me as he sat backwards on my belly. I kneed him right in the belly, gave him a good punch to chin too. He started tugging on my hair, so I elbowed him real good in the chest. By this time, the neighbourhood kids had gathered round, were cheering us on. Anyway, with that elbow, he leggo of my hair. I tried to scramble away, but he reached out, got my ankle and tugged me down again. Tried to grab my other foot, but since I didn’t have any laces on, my boot flew off. I was kicking at him, and managed to get him right in the shoulder at least once, but then he sank his teeth into my leg. He bit hard, breaking the skin and oooh boy did I get mad. I yanked away real fast, spun around and punched him square in the eye. I didn’t stop wailing on him till our mommas come running out, pulled us offa each other.

I ain’t ever seen momma so mad. But she wasn’t angry at me just then. She was angry at Alfie, especially once she gotta look at my leg. Now, I never said I didn’t start the fight, but momma was not impressed any which way you looked at it. She sent Alfie off with Auntie Les, and dragged me in the apartment. Sat me down, and gave me a real good talking to as she cleaned up my leg. I can still remember what she said, each sentence punctuated with another sweep of antibiotic ooze over the bite.

 

“Angela. You have to stop doing this. You’ll get yourself hurt one day, always runnin’ that mouth of yours. Am I supposed to tell your gran that you managed to go an’ get yourself killed cause you just had to have the last damn word, girl?”

 

I remember too, how her eyes looked. At the time, I thought she was mad at me, but now I know it wasn’t me. She was mad at the world, ya know? Mad at how dangerous it was, is, especially for a girl with a big mouth. I ignored her then, but now….now I see what she was talking about. Now, I live the things I didn’t even know existed back when I was a kid. I see the soldiers coming in, jumpin’ at noises and shadows. I see the women coming in, thumbs spinning rings over and over again, the gold sharp against their black dresses. I see the parents coming in, making for a table with three seats, only to pause and head to the two seater in the corner. I hold my bag a bit closer when I walk the streets, and when I go alone at night, well...I hold my keys in my hand, ya know? The world..it’s a scary place. There are bigger bullies than Alfie and not all of them can be taken care of by Auntie Les. You can’t let that fear get you, but, that don’t mean you can’t feel it.

 

Anyway, I’m rambling now. I’ll just put this lil’ book away and wander down to supper.  Might be able to eat something, as long as it’s easy on the stomach. Till next time.

  
  
  



	11. April 12th

**April 12th, 4pm**

So, I went in last night for a closing shift. Joan was with me, takin Margie’s shift. I learned quite a bit about her while we worked. That girl is a total crack up. I haven’t laughed that hard while moppin since the day Martin tripped over the bucket and slid halfway across the floor. He was alright, but lord, he was not happy. He actually took off a bit early today as well for another interview, and then it was just me and Joan finishing up after the automat closed down. Anyway, so I duck into the kitchen to empty the mop water out and all of a sudden Joan is right behind me. Now, I mentioned she was Irish, but apparently she’s also some kinda witch or fairy, cause I sure didn’t hear her coming. Anyway, she smiled and reached up above my head, grabbing one of the brushes hanging on the wall before disappearing back into the dining room.  

I just kinda shook my head, and went back to what I was doing. All of a sudden, the lights out front go off. I jump up, and Joan is back in the kitchen with me, hand on my arm. She said something about a fuse blowing, and if I’d hold the flashlight, she’d go ahead and see if she could fix it. At this point, I just wanna get home, and so I agree, cause if we didn’t, we’d have had ta wait on a repairman to come out.

Anyway, we go to the back, and I’m holding the flashlight. We’re stuck in this tiny little cupboard, Joan is fiddling with the box and all of a sudden whatever she has a hold on snaps, and her elbow cracks right onto my head. I end up on the floor, Joan is ontop of me trying to check if I’m hurt and I just can’t do anything but laugh. Sure, I was crying a bit, and it hurt something fierce but we’re half in, half out of a closet and all of a sudden it gets even  better cause, Joan stops laughing. Gets this funny look on her face and leans down real close. I could see she wasn’t sure and I just rolled my eyes, and tugged her down. So there we were. The floor’s got mop water on it, soaking through my dress, the flashlight is somewhere on the floor and the automat is only half lit up, but damn I ain’t been kissed like this for years. Joan is a real good kisser, and it only gets better cause she does this thing with her tongue and I nearly flew off the floor, even though the only place she had it was my mouth.

Well, I wasn’t gonna let her get away with that. I fought dirty, slipping my knee between her legs and pushing. She gasped and I took my chance, rolling us over. I leaned down, just ready to try my hand when the back door opened up. I swear to you, my heart was in my throat and---

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Intentional cut off there at the end, see you next update my lovelies~


	12. April 12th Second Entry

**April 12th, 6pm**

If it ain’t one thing it’s another. I was sitting here, writing about what happened and all of a sudden, I got three of the other girls running around shouting “FIRE” in the hallway. We had to evacuate the building, even though there wasn’t any smoke and not only that but we had to have firefighters show up and check everything. Mrs. Fry wasn’t pleased at all. After the building got an all clear, we tramped back inside, sat down in the dining room and got a lecture fit to make your ears bleed. All “respect” and “responsibility”. Not to mention all the talk of finding ourselves a proper husband. After that little talk, I begged off dinner, claiming a stress headache. Wasn’t a stress headache so much as a headache from having to deal with Mrs. Fry. She drives me nuts sometimes. Anyway, where was I? Oh right. So Joan and I are on the ground, I’m on top, leaning in to kiss her and all of a sudden, the door opens. Well, we sprang apart real fast, and my tailbone is bruised from where I banged it offa the linoleum. That stuff hurts. And we look up at the door, and there’s Martin, keys in his hand and this look on his face like he can’t believe what he’s seeing. I scramble up and Joan does the same, and I dunno what we were saying, ‘cause our words were tumblin’ over each other, but Martin just holds up a hand and we stop right then. Anyway, he walks in and takes a seat, just kinda lookin’ at us. I swallowed my heart back down, and asked him what he was gonna do about what he saw. Would you believe me if I said, he said nuthin? Martin...he started talking about the war, about how he knew two men who loved each other more than anything. One of em had died, something real tragic. Fell offa train in the mountains. Then, I guess the other was a pilot, cause he went down in the sea. Joan was nearly crying when he finished and I suppose I just...it made me sad too. The thought of losing someone like that….I can’t even imagine.

 

Anyways, Martin stayed and helped us clean up. Joan managed to fix the fuse box. After that, Martin left. He even winked on the way out. Really is a swell person. Joan and I, well. There’s a reason I didn’t write about this until today. She took me back to her apartment, her roomate wasn’t home so, we uh, got a bit closer. She was real nice, made sure I knew she wasn’t looking for anything more than few nights together. Said she wasn’t the relationship type, if that was okay with me.  I said it was fine, cause it is you know? I’m looking for someone, but it ain’t Joan, even though she’s a peach. Went off in the morning, managed to sneak past Mrs. Fry with the help of Louisa. She did have to load me into the laundry elevator, send me up, but that was alright.

 

I think I’ll see Joan again. Just cause it’s nice to have someone to curl up with. I hadn’t realized how much I missed being kissed. Missed being hugged too, ya know? Makes me feel a bit better that I’m not sighing after Miss Margaret Carter so much that I miss out on an opportunity. Tomorrow, I have another shift, and then I’m supposed to go out dancing. The day after that, I’m gonna have two rehearsals and a costume fitting. I can’t wait to see what I turn out like. I wonder if Peggy would like to come. I should ask her. It’d be nice to see a friendly face at opening night, since I know my family won’t be coming. Anyway, I’m gonna go snag something to eat from down the road. I’ll be around. Ain’t going nowhere fast, story of my life!

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for the cliff hanger. (I'm not actually sorry, I know you all loved it.)


	13. April 15th

**April 15th, 8:30 pm**

I think my face is about to split. English came in today at the end of my shift. And when I took off my apron, getting ready to leave, she asked me to sit down. We musta talked for two hours, because I looked up and it was eight already. Peggy caught my glance and got real quiet all of a sudden. She asked if I needed to leave. I said no, but she smiled and stood up. "I do hope we'll do this again sometime," she said. "It is rather nice to have a...friend. Thank you for the cobbler." She covered my hand when she finished, only for a moment and then picked up her bag. I waved at her as she left, and Joan winked at me from the kitchen. A friend. Peggy Carter considers me a friend.


	14. May 14th

**May 14th, 3:00 pm**

I don’t even know what to say anymore. It’s….my… I don’t know what to say. I don’t think there’s words for this kinda stuff. I mean. You don’t go expectin’ it to happen. But stuff does. I can’t even think righ’ now. I’m...I’m gonna go take a nap. Maybe write later. I miss her already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't worry too much. The next update will be posted just after this one. And yes, Peggy is fine, Angie is obviously fine, if a bit shaken. For those who don't mind the spoiler, read on. 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> ~~(Angie's gran died.) ~~~~~~


	15. May 26

**May 26th, 1:07 am**

  
I gotta get on with my life. I can’t be crying about this anymore. Gran wouldn’t want that. I went to church, lit a candle for her. I did.  
And I think...I think it'll help.  
She was old enough, ya know? Nearly ninety eight. Lived and loved through a lot.  
I wanna be like her. Live like she did.  
I wanna find someone to love as much as she loved grandad. Maybe have a family, have kids of my own. I know that liking girls, that might be hard but...I can manage it. There's ways.  
I should make a list. Write down everything I want to do. I'll be famous. Travel the world.  
She'll be proud of me. I just gotta wipe my tears and get on with it.

I'll be all right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay! Traveling through Europe at the mo'.


	16. June 13th

**June 13th, 3:45 pm**

 

Alright. So I got a list kinda started. I'll need to put it in here, I've been working on it for two weeks almost. Neglecting this diary for it. Oh! But the best part about it is I was working on it while we were slow one day, and Peggy came in. She saw me writing, asked what I was writing about. Then looked real embarrassed about it. I laughed it off, an’ told her if she had a minute, I'd explain. She nodded and told me she'd listen, but only if I poured myself a cuppa Joe and sat down. So I laughed and sat down and showed her what I was doing, explained why. She said it was a real good idea, that “Everyone should be as driven and as prepared to fight for what they love,” as I was. Honest, I nearly fell outta my seat. I know I was blushing too. God, I swear angels almost started singing. Next entry’ll be the list. I gotta finalize it you know? Might frame it too. Hell, Peggy touched it, I should frame it just for that. Would be a swell decoration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, wow. I've been gone for ages! Here's an update for all you lovelies!


	17. July 2nd

**July 2nd, 12:32 am**

Later than normal again, but I can’t sleep so I’m out past curfew. Gonna hafta get someone to sneak me in or stay up till the sun rises. I could go find a good breakfast at the market, but I do wanna sleep sometime. 

So anyway, the list that I finally finished. 

  1. Travel the rest of Europe
  2. Be a famous actress
  3. Learn another language, maybe French
  4. Learn to make the perfect apple pie
  5. Have a closet just for shoes
  6. Run a food drive
  7. Drive a convertible
  8. Travel to America
  9. Go to at least fifteen different countries and perform
  10. Marry someone I love and have kids. Even if it’s a girl



I know some of it might not be the easiest to do, but I’m sure gonna try. I put some little sorta things in there, just to make it easy. I think I can drive a convertible as soon as I convince someone to let me, and that’ll be real soon if I flash a smile. 

**Author's Note:**

> As always, find me [here](http://hums-happily.tumblr.com/) on tumblr.  
> Any notification of errors are accepted with gratefulness that knows no bounds.  
> Kudos, comments, and your happy (pained) flailing are accepted with glee. I hope you enjoyed!  
> 


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